Park Day, and turning 30

I turned 30 this month. I’ve worried about being 30 since I hit my mid-20s, and that worry over 30 as a deadline has catapulted me into lots of decisions that led to where I am today. I celebrated with very little fanfare. I spent the days surrounding it with lots of reflection and gratitude. I know now that it’s just a number. But I also do feel a lot of things changing. My body, giving me different signals, gaining new permanent marks and lines, surprising me often, and it’s not always bad. My thoughts, spending more and more time into the compartmentalized futures and possibilities that now define my presents. I catch myself saying the very things I said I’d never say when I hit this age. I catch myself wondering if I’m acting my age or not. And I catch myself worrying too much over these things, when I shouldn’t be.

Things are shifting again… after half a year (!) of semi-reclusion and lots of rest, and focusing on my mind and my body, I’m starting to pick up some new projects again. Excited to see where this would take me… last night in between meetings, it hit me how much I wanted this, how much this is looking to be exactly as I pictured it. Just last month, I started feeling like things seemed to be going slow, and I was halfway wondering happened to my gung-ho-ness, what happened to all the things I was intending to do. But I also felt that things will happen anyway as they ought. In their own time and season. I’m less religious now, but that is still my life verse. I write everything down. I write everything down and commit them to my heart and mind, and send them out as a semi-prayer for the universe. I write things down and I let them happen, one by one.

Life is not perfect… we have a LOT of debt and obligations. I should’ve spent those six months, 90% house-bound, working out or learning to cook. We worry about our parents and their health. I get extremely moody and anxious about the pettiest things, prone to crying and being frustrated in public parks or our bedroom for the most random of reasons.

But we get by. We are in movement, we are flowing, we are letting the winds and waves take us where we need to go and we are OK with all of it.

Photos taken at Ninoy Aquino Parks and Wildlife, Quezon City

 

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My Wedding Look

R x K-144Got married to the love of my life last week! After 10 years of being together, it was long overdue (hehe) but the timing also makes sense… we’re at that point in our lives when we are thinking of making big leaps and sealing our union on paper seemed like a good move. Now comes the hard (and fun) part — actually starting out as a family unit!

Now I want to talk about my look 🙂

R x K-36

My bridal shoes were from Hue Manila. I actually got them just days before our wedding! Haha. I didn’t think of shoes until the lastest minute, and already had another pair sorted out, but when I saw this one, I knew it was the one and ordered it right away. Fortunately it arrived just in time!

R x K-42R x K-64R x K-67

My make up was by Kist Ong-Tantuan. I’ve known her since college/theater days, and she’s pretty in demand in our Elbi circle for special events ❤ We had a trial way back in January and she gave me invaluable tips (which I dutifully followed) so that my skin would look as best as it could on the big day. I didn’t even have a brief — and I loved the light look she did, which highlighted my eyes and gave definition / angles to my face.

True story: I completely overlooked accessories! I just wore my mom’s pearl earrings and my engagement ring. Our hair stylist Mhaki Maginang saved the day with the brilliant idea of putting fresh flowers in my hair, with assistance from my sister and bridesmaid Ahlee.

R x K-81R x K-88

My gown was off the rack from Jorella’s Fashion Gallery. After only a couple of fittings from several boutiques, I found this dress back in October, and after sleeping on it for a week, I took it home with me (that’s the thing with RTW, you can’t think about it too long or else someone else might get it). My Pinterest board was full of very simple, wide skirt styles so I never thought I’d choose a mermaid dress, but when I tried it on (and, lbh, when I saw the price tag for less than P8k — seriously!!!), I decided it was the one! I felt beautiful in it, and many guests couldn’t believe it was RTW. It was very me after all, to “find” the perfect dress at the perfect, believe-it-or-not price.

R x K-132

Honestly, we did not do a lot “planning” for the wedding save for sticking to our budget (more like blowing it), focusing on our looks and who to invite. We entrusted the day to a lot of good friends and loved ones who blew us away with the skill and generosity. I will share more about this in my next post, if only to honor them and extend the happy post-celebration feels a little bit more. 🙂

Looking up and inward

mnl-color-3mnl-color-2mnl-color-1Manila looks a whole lot different when you look up (and invest a few dollars in an analog emulation app’s premium version). VSCO has always been my go-to, and I’ve bought so many film packs already before they introduced the X membership (but I think $20 / year might be too much?). Then there’s also Afterlight, VHS Cam, Snapseed, SKWRT — and now Kuji, the Huji for Android, which is honestly not bad. Mildly obsessed with it, and I’ve infected Ranie as well… follow our fan account? Haha.

(A random set of paragraphs about my life follows) Continue reading “Looking up and inward”

Me, 2017

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When people talk about the future, they usually go: “I’m afraid because I don’t know what’s gonna happen next.” Jumping into the unknown is scary.

As I close 2017, however, I’m afraid because I know exactly what’s in store for me next year. Continue reading “Me, 2017”

💖 10 Years 💖

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“If there’s any kind of magic in this world it must be in the attempt of understanding someone sharing something.”

(Before Sunrise, 1995)


Continue reading “💖 10 Years 💖”

Ships

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I can’t sleep yet, on account of bad food decisions and maybe too much time today. This isn’t going to be very clear. Forgive me, future self.

Like the rest of the world, we finished off Stranger Things 2 last week, but I haven’t properly processed post-mortem perspectives about it until right now, on account of last Monday being a Monday: it came with that sort of numbing adrenaline rush you dive into headfirst, much like the cold shower you jump into just to get it over with – you’re not happy about it, but it’s happening anyway. Also, I had to finish the Beyond aftershow special as well, made all the more charming by Jim Rash – Netflix knows us so well, doesn’t it? And how well it is shaping us too – more on that later. I feel like I have much more to write about the peripherals of the entire experience – binge-watching culture, the context of adults finding escapism with a set of well-cast, perfectly-mannered talented white kids – than the actual content of the show itself. Continue reading “Ships”

My sister’s wedding

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12/28/2016

My sister is younger than me by 11 months but she is my idol in so many ways… on top of being an awesome mother to Fourth she, along with Third, have organized an elegant, romantic celebration of their union last month. It meant a happy Christmas for the family as Papa came home…

I could only hope that, in my time, I could pull off the same. LOL Continue reading “My sister’s wedding”

City Of Stars – Cover (from the La La Land OST)

This isn’t a perfect cover but I’m so happy because there were no dogs nor roosters in this one-shot live recording. 🙂 Tsamba 🙂

Me, 2016

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In lieu of a long text post of a photo re-compilation (as I’ve previously done), I thought I’d try my hand at making a simple infographic of the stats and things that made up my year. It was pretty easy to do this in on infogr.am. (You’d think that being in content marketing, I’d know that infographics are sooo 2014 and I should be doing social videos instead! We’ll get to that, we will). Continue reading “Me, 2016”

It’s been a while

I have been too busy to file my own stories. Q4 is usually is an easy coast for me; this year it wasn’t. But 2016 is closing in less than two months, I am excited to finish it with a satisfactory flourish. To complete our big projects well, finish my year-ender story, find a new person to join the team, make sure everyone is still happy. Me included of course.

My dear Lola passed away last September 27. It’s been 40 days since but my family is still healing. I am trying my best to be by Mama’s side as much as I can to make sure that she looks after herself too whilst we fix up loose ends and take care of her Ate. We miss Lola so much; she was already 82 but she was still gone so soon.

Ahlee is finally doing her church ceremony next month and I have a dress I am excited to wear and we are finalizing preparations and we are looking forward to that spot of happiness. Papa is still deciding  hard whether to come home or just give the couple a big monetary gift! This I do not completely understand. This makes me worry because what about next year? But I think I am also overthinking it.

I have been overthinking A LOT. And it has been putting a strain on how I communicate with Ranie. We will be 9 years together next year; and our relationship now is actually way more challenging than it was when we were 2 broke Comm major students. But we find ways to make it work. Him especially. I do not know where I will be without his strength and faith.

I am still looking forward to going on an adventure before the year ends; hopefully I still manage one travel post within this month. Crossed fingers.